How to lose friends and alienate people

[susie_flo]

While I was in the shower my mind continued with the "if so and so were a XXX..."   and I decided to re-cast a handful of you lot as pets.
     
So here are my assertions... (I shall slink off and duck now)

• If sara_louwere a pet, she would be an elegant, fussy siamese cat that makes you feel privileged when it wants to be on your lap
• If steerwere a pet, he would be an over-enthusiastic springer spaniel who charges around licking everybody in a shockingly fickle manner
• If rosamiculawere a pet, she would be a fine-plumed ragdoll that refuses to act like a pedigree and sneaks out for nights on the tiles with swaggering toms
• If childericwere a pet, he would be a long-limbed afghan hound... prone to poncing around with ideas above his station, but ultimately still a dog 
• If zoo_music_girlwere a pet, she would be a photogenic show dog who gets her hair done at the pooch parlour once a week
• If mia_oiawere a pet, she would be a talking budgie who knows far too much and shows you up when your parents come round
• If gylfinirwere a pet, she would be a golden retriever who bounds around when you are happy and nuzzles you with mournful gaze when you are depressed
• If ms_siobhanwere a pet, she would be a blowsy lap cat who looks at you askance and then headbuts you to let you know that you are a stupid inferior being but she loves you anyway
• If moral_vacuumwere a pet, he would be a sarcastic parrot
• If sushidogwere a pet, she would be a restless capuchin monkey that endlessly invades your kitchen cupboards and has a penchant for shaving her fur into fascinating patterns
• If kissmeforlongerwere a pet, she would be a silent black cat with fastidious habits and an unnerving tendency to stare at you with one eyebrow raised 
• As for me...  I suspect I might be a lazy, middle-aged labrador who hogs the sofa and loves you forever as long as I am fed
   

Ok, you can all throw rotten tomatoes at me now!

*tsk - edited for spelling mistakes*

Comments

[the-meanest-cat.livejournal.com]

Funnily enough, that exact idea had occurred to me ;-)

[moral-vacuum.livejournal.com]

*pokes out tongue rudely*

[rosamicula.livejournal.com]

Brilliant!

[zoo-music-girl.livejournal.com]

I go to the hairdressers maybe twice a year, sometimes three if I can be bothered! Not sure about the dog bit (I'm a cat person in as much as I like animals much at all), but thanks for the "photogenic". :)

[the-meanest-cat.livejournal.com]

Well alright, but I still think of you as a good hair girl. And you also wore that marvellous purple wig.

[zoo-music-girl.livejournal.com]

Thanks. :)

[sushidog.livejournal.com]

Oh, I should love to be a capuchin, they're excellent! And I've always thought of childeric as being like an Afghan. Admittedly the afghan in question is usually Whatamess...

[the-meanest-cat.livejournal.com]

*evil laugh" I see what you mean

[childeric.livejournal.com]

Oo, yes, I like Afghans! That's nice! :)

[steer.livejournal.com]

.You know I am not sure Dougal is actually an Afghan?

[steer.livejournal.com]

Hmph... that is absolutely the last time I charge around licking you young lady!

[gylfinir.livejournal.com]

Ha ha ha! Fabulous! I see myself as more of a cat, but I think your version's brilliant :-)

[kissmeforlonger.livejournal.com]

A bit like my existing cat then :-O

*laughs lots*

I'd always had a mental picture of Richard as a spaniel.